“Declan Burke is his own genre. The Lammisters dazzles, beguiles and transcends. Virtuoso from start to finish.” – Eoin McNamee “This bourbon-smooth riot of jazz-age excess, high satire and Wodehouse flamboyance is a pitch-perfect bullseye of comic brilliance.” – Irish Independent Books of the Year 2019 “This rapid-fire novel deserves a place on any bookshelf that grants asylum to PG Wodehouse, Flann O’Brien or Kyril Bonfiglioli.” – Eoin Colfer, Guardian Best Books of the Year 2019 “The funniest book of the year.” – Sunday Independent “Declan Burke is one funny bastard. The Lammisters ... conducts a forensic analysis on the anatomy of a story.” – Liz Nugent “Burke’s exuberant prose takes centre stage … He plays with language like a jazz soloist stretching the boundaries of musical theory.” – Totally Dublin “A mega-meta smorgasbord of inventive language ... linguistic verve not just on every page but every line.” – Irish Times “Above all, The Lammisters gives the impression of a writer enjoying himself. And so, dear reader, should you.” – Sunday Times “A triumph of absurdity, which burlesques the literary canon from Shakespeare, Pope and Austen to Flann O’Brien … The Lammisters is very clever indeed.” – The Guardian
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Babysitter, With Occasional Gun
Afterwards, a young girl called Lily went around collecting the autographs of every writer present. It took the combined persuasion of John Connolly and Alex Barclay to convince her that the dubious-looking guy skulking by the door was, in fact, an author. “You know I’m not famous or anything,” I told her. “I don’t care,” she said, “if you’re a real writer.” I believe the children are our future, etc. I told her that my daughter’s name is Lily too. She was pleased about that. “Tell her I’m Lily Conlon,” she said. I will.
Eats and drinks were the order of the night in the aftermath, during which I discovered that Paul Johnston is (a) a top bloke and (b) the story I’m currently working on will need to be either reworked dramatically or scrapped entire. Which is a bit of a bummer, because I’ve been working on it for five or six years, on and off, and written close to half a million words. Still, Paul didn’t tell me anything I haven’t been secretly suspecting myself for quite some time now. And I did manage to postpone the nervous breakdown until I left the restaurant. So that was good.
Anyhoos, it’s upward and onward to this morning’s 11am panel, with Critical Mick waving the baton. The topic? ‘Real Fiction, Real Ireland’. Except when I was writing THE BIG O, I was very deliberately writing a story with a non-specific setting. Plus it’s a comedy crime caper that bears very little relation to reality. Should be fun …
7 comments:
Sounds like I'm really missing out. Maybe I'll make it to Books 2009 though.
gb
I would love to be there to listen to the writing panels - what a great line-up of authors.
I'm glad you mentioned that you deliberately wrote The Bog O with a non-specific setting. I was wondering about that. I am drinking Guiness and using a drink coaster from a West Cork pub as I read so I'm establishing a bit of Irish ambiance.
Er, that's The Big O, not The Bog O. Not a Freudian slip, I promise.
Yep, it was fun. And where are my kidneys?
Quick question, Dec:
How is it that you can sustain interest on a project for so long? Five or six years? A half a million words? I'd love to hear the premise of that story sometime?
Sounds like a great conference, though.
Five or six years on and off, Keith, while also writing other stuff ... and the half-million words written (and rewritten) has been pared down to about 125,000 ... I guess I'm just so fascinated by the story that I want to get it right-right-right. And I'm not a good enough writer yet to get it that way. Maybe I need to shelve it for ten years ... Cheers, Dec
Your saying you are not famous reminded me of the story that when NY Yankees star catcher Yogi Berra was introduced to Ernest Hemingway and told he was a writer. He asked 'What paper are you with?'
You are certainly famous as the father of the beautiful Princess Lily.
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