“Declan Burke is his own genre. The Lammisters dazzles, beguiles and transcends. Virtuoso from start to finish.” – Eoin McNamee “This bourbon-smooth riot of jazz-age excess, high satire and Wodehouse flamboyance is a pitch-perfect bullseye of comic brilliance.” – Irish Independent Books of the Year 2019 “This rapid-fire novel deserves a place on any bookshelf that grants asylum to PG Wodehouse, Flann O’Brien or Kyril Bonfiglioli.” – Eoin Colfer, Guardian Best Books of the Year 2019 “The funniest book of the year.” – Sunday Independent “Declan Burke is one funny bastard. The Lammisters ... conducts a forensic analysis on the anatomy of a story.” – Liz Nugent “Burke’s exuberant prose takes centre stage … He plays with language like a jazz soloist stretching the boundaries of musical theory.” – Totally Dublin “A mega-meta smorgasbord of inventive language ... linguistic verve not just on every page but every line.Irish Times “Above all, The Lammisters gives the impression of a writer enjoying himself. And so, dear reader, should you.” – Sunday Times “A triumph of absurdity, which burlesques the literary canon from Shakespeare, Pope and Austen to Flann O’Brien … The Lammisters is very clever indeed.” – The Guardian

Monday, March 9, 2009

The Real IRA: Even Better Than The Real Thing?

Given that the Real IRA are still fighting for a united Ireland by the traditional method of attempting to assassinate Polish pizza delivery men, ask yourself this: who would you rather see on Irish streets, British soldiers or the Real IRA? And no, you’re not allowed answer ‘Neither’.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

To my knowledge, British soldiers have never attempted to stop delivery of a delicious sausage, onion and green pepper thin crust. Based on that, they win.

Ted Leddy said...

I want to see all British soldiers off Irish streets. But consider the following. The Real IRA think that if you deliver a pizza to a British Army base then you deserve to die. The Army's 5000 man peace time garrison in the north stepped down from its role of assisting the PSNI in 2007. The majority of British military installations have been dismantled and the British prescence in NI is virtually invisible. To answer your question, I think the Real IRA are emphatically worse that the Brits.

Dana King said...

I'm embarrassed to say I didn;t know there was a group called the Real IRA. I knew there were splinter groups that didn;t go along with the cessation of hostilities--we Yanks are total dolts about world affairs--but didn;t realize that was the name of one of them.

I did, however, in my ignorance, use Real IRA as the name of an IRA splinter group in an unsold novel of mine. I'm either better tat this than I thought, or an even bigger idiot.

John McFetridge said...

What we discovered in Canada is that if you want to get rid of British soldiers you need to become as boring as humanly possible.

Peter Rozovsky said...

Maybe the deliverymen were trying to kill off the Brits by hardening their arteries ... "... the pizza delivery men who were collaborating with British rule by servicing British soldiers.”
God help us.
==============
Detectives Beyond Borders
"Because Murder Is More Fun Away From Home"
http://www.detectivesbeyondborders.blogspot.com/

John McFetridge said...

Reading Ted's comment above, it seems the Real IRA would be the most at a loss if the British soldiers left completely.

What would they do then, deliver pizzas?