“Prose both scabrous and poetic.” – Publishers Weekly. “Proust meets Chandler over a pint of Guinness.” – Spectator. “A sheer pleasure.” – Tana French. “Among the most memorable books of the year, of any genre.” – Sunday Times. “A hardboiled delight.” – Guardian. “Imagine Donald Westlake and Richard Stark collaborating on a screwball noir.” – Kirkus Reviews. “A cross between Raymond Chandler and Flann O’Brien.” – John Banville. “The effortless cool of Elmore Leonard at his peak.” – Ray Banks. “A fine writer at the top of his game.” – Lee Child.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

What Lilyput Did Next # 306: Erm, She Scarpered

A Minister for Propaganda Elf writes: “It is with great sadness that we announce this to be the final ‘Princess Lilyput’ post on Crime Always Pays. The Grand Vizier, need it be said, had been growing increasingly agitated over the last number of weeks that Lilyput was hogging all his limelight, and has finally stepped in to proclaim a moratorium on Lilyput pics and vids. The bugger. Anyhoo, as a compromise that might go some way to disguising the fact that he is a heartless cad who’s only in it for the money, the Grand Viz has agreed to Lilyput having her own blog, and to host a link to said interweb malarkey on the top left of CAP. Which leads us to the pics below, the first of which was taken when the Grand Viz broke the bad news to a stunned Lilyput …



“… and the second, one quick-change later, when she realised she was finally free of that dozy old curmudgeon who keeps singing the poxy songs.


Quoth Lily:
“Boopy-doop!”
“So there you have it: Princess Lilyput gets her own blog. It’s called Lilyput’s World. It’s guaranteed Grand Vizier-free. What more could you ask for? Be beautiful, people.”

8 comments:

pattinase (abbott) said...

I have hereby erased my link to your blog and added Lilyput's. You just can't compete with that face.

Donna said...

Thank goodness. I can just stop reading Crime Always Pays now and head straight for the important one.

Lilyput has the most amazing facial expressions. What a doll.

Donna

bookwitch said...

Well, my daughter only ever came here for Lily's sake. She's off now, and very happy.

Bookwitch's Daughter said...

yup...I am off. See You! (I say this whilst waving and singing the special song!)

Declan Burke said...

Hmmmm ... yet another dastardly scheme goes boopy-doop-shaped. Ah well, I can't fault your impeccable taste, ladies ... Cheers, Dec

Josh Schrank said...

I've forwarded Lily's blog to my grandsons, who are already fighting over who gets to ask her on a date first. Well, the older one is fighting, the younger one is just gurgling. I hope you don't mind Lily being betrothed and moving to the wilds of northern Michigan in a few years...

Gary said...

join the queue Josh, my buck has first dibs

Josh Schrank said...

Gary, nice to meet you. Sorry, but I'm really anti standing in line (unless there is Macallan or Glenfiddich at the end of it...) We've gone ahead and set up the "Lilyput Scholarship Trust Fund" with my grandson, Hunter, as power of attorney over it. I'm sure there are only three or four universities here in the states that it will be good at... :D