“Prose both scabrous and poetic.” – Publishers Weekly. “Proust meets Chandler over a pint of Guinness.” – Spectator. “A sheer pleasure.” – Tana French. “Among the most memorable books of the year, of any genre.” – Sunday Times. “A hardboiled delight.” – Guardian. “Imagine Donald Westlake and Richard Stark collaborating on a screwball noir.” – Kirkus Reviews. “A cross between Raymond Chandler and Flann O’Brien.” – John Banville. “The effortless cool of Elmore Leonard at his peak.” – Ray Banks. “A fine writer at the top of his game.” – Lee Child.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Comment Box Abuse: A Letter To ‘Melissa’

A Minister for Propaganda Elf writes: “Hi, ‘Melissa’. In case you’re wondering why your comment was deleted last night, it’s because the Grand Vizier has read his Homer and doesn’t really approve of sneaky Trojan Horse attempts, via comment box link inserts, to publicise novels on Crime Always Pays without prior approval. You’re not the first to try it, and you very probably won’t be the last, but the one thing you can be certain of is that underhand promotional tactics are (a) unwelcome and (b) unnecessary. Crime Always Pays, while celebrating for the most part Irish crime and mystery fiction, is open to all crime writers of all nationalities – i.e., if you wanted to promote your new novel, all you had to do was ask. There are any number of ways in which you could have been accommodated: the weekly Q&A, the ‘Mi Casa, Su Casa’ slot, a competition giveaway, or simply a précis of what your novel is about and why you think the world at large should be told about it. It’s easy-peasy, it’s polite and mannerly, and that way everyone’s a winner – as Peter Clenott, for example, discovered last week. We wish you the very best with your new novel, ‘Melissa’, and hope that it’s a huge success for you, although given our experience of the crime and mystery writing and reading community, and its mind-bogglingly generous response to our attempts to drum up some support for our humble offering THE BIG O, we suggest that in the long run a more honest and transparent approach to your promotional activities will prove more beneficial. Peace, out.”

3 comments:

Josh Schrank said...

GV, you're much too kind. My cousin, Vito from Brooklyn is more than happy to help with 'rubber hose time.' Just let me know and he'll respond as soon as he finishes his latest term. A gratuitous offering to his bookie would be greatly appreciated.

Penguin said...

Thank God I was in an honest mood that day.

crimefcreader said...

I let her have it. From sitemeter, I note she came to It's a Crime directly from Crime Always Pays and picked an old post to comment on. We have to remember that some innocent virgins out there don't have the knowledge to realise how blogs work, Declan. This includes innocuous and bland comments on blogs that lead nowhere. Blog readers tend not to bother to follow links and blog writers will, out of curiosity only. Then comes the dead end, on both sides. Not viral marketing but a bacterium that met with the bloggers' antibiotic for a full play down in whatever form.